Hey,
it's been a while again, but as they say, i'm hanging on.
My falling deeper and deeper into my thoughts. The negative ones. The full numbness is tearing me apart. Problems at home and work. having a hard time distinguishing between my job and family time. My thoughts have been getting tougher and tougher. but at the same time the numbness is making it a bit easier as i can't find the motivation to care. I'm always down low, except of course when i have to wear my ''happy'' mask.
It feels like its never getting better, just problems on problems and its dragging me down. Not sure what to do about it... feels like there isn't anything to do. i'm writing it down to get it off my chest. I'm avoiding talking to people face-to-face, just to not see their attitude towards me. Not sure if anyone ever cares. Is this what adulthood is like? just constant numbness and the desire to die? I can't remember the last time I really felt happiness.
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